Humour |
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kbannon
Admin Group E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
Topic: Humour Posted: 09-December-2003 at 20:53 |
Im in tears here How will you be after the Christmas Party? ------------------------------------------------------------------- Real men answer C! 1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire earth. You decide 2. As you grow older, what lost quality of your youthful life do you miss the most? 3. When is it okay to kiss another male? 4. In your opinion, the ideal pet is: 5 You have been seeing a woman for several years. She's attractive and intelligent, and you always enjoy being with her. One leisurely Sundayafternoon the two of you are taking it easy. You're watching a football game; she's reading the papers when she suddenly, out of the clear blue sky, tells you that she thinks she really loves you, but, she can no longer bear the uncertainty of not knowing where your relationship is going. She says she's not asking whether you want to get married; only whether you believe that you have some kind of future together. What do you say? 6. Okay, so you have decided that you truly love a woman and you want to spend the rest of your life with her, sharing the joys and the sorrows the world has to offer, come what may. How do you tell her? 7. One weekday morning your wife wakes up feeling ill and asks you to get your three children ready for school. Your first question to her i 8. When is it okay to throw away a set of veteran underwear? 9. What is the human race's single greatest achievement? 10. What, in your opinion, is the most reasonable explanation for the fact that Moses led the Israelites all over the place for forty years before they finally got to the Promised Land? Edited by kbannon |
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kbannon
Admin Group E39 525i Sport Individual Joined: 09-October-2002 Location: 64 Zoo Lane Status: Offline Points: 15508 |
Posted: 16-January-2004 at 20:09 |
George Bush Quotes: Be scared, be very, very scared!
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." "One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'." "I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future." "The future will be better tomorrow." "We're going to have the best educated American people in the world." "I stand by all the misstatements that I've made." "We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe." "Public speaking is very easy." "A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls." "We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur." "For NASA, space is still a high priority." "Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children." "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." "It's time for the human race to enter the solar system." |
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Current: 2009 E60 520d "Sport" tractor
Previous: 1989 E30 320i SE 1997 E39 523i 2003 E39 525i Sport Individual |
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tris
Groupie Joined: 04-July-2003 Location: United Kingdom Status: Offline Points: 86 |
Posted: 21-January-2004 at 13:15 |
Excellent Killian
My current favourite Bush quote is:- "The trouble with the French is that they don't have a word for Entrepreneur"! |
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